Trash Talk

March 7, 2018

One day, Ozark Outlaw was doing some work around the range in Heber Springs, AR.  He dug down to a depth of 10 feet and found traces of copper cable dating back 100 years. With the help of local historians they came to the conclusion that Arkansas had a telephone network more than 100 years ago.

Shortly after that, Arkansas Harper was digging on his property and when he hit 20 feet he also found traces of copper cable but this one dated back over 200 years.  Again, with the help of local Arkansas historians, they came to the conclusion that Arkansas actually had an advanced high-tech communications network over 200 years ago.  

It wasn’t long after that when J-Bar was doing some work around the SMR range.  He sank a hole over 30 feet deep and didn’t find anything.  After consulting with local Missouri historians and scientists, they concluded that Missouri had gone wireless over 300 years ago!!!!!!!

Yee Haw. Just makes a person proud to be from Missouri.

April 5, 2018

Flag Pole

When Greasy Creek Slim and Cajun arrived at “Hell on the Border", they found Ambler and Outrider standing at the entrance looking up at the flag pole.  Greasy Creek Slim asked if they needed any help.

Ambler said, “Naildriver wants to know how high the flagpole is but we don’t have a ladder that tall.”

Greasy Creek and Cajun looked at the pole for a minute then asked if Ambler or Outrider had a crescent wrench.  Outrider handed Cajun a wrench.  Cajun loosened and removed one of the two bolts at the bottom of the flagpole, allowing the pole to pivot on the other bolt.  Greasy Creek helped Cajun lower the flagpole to the ground.

Greasy picked up a tape measure and with Cajun holding one end on the bottom of the pole, he walked to the other end and said loudly, “25 feet.”

Then Greasy Creek and Cajun raised the pole back to the upright position, got in the truck and headed on to the office.

Ambler and Outrider looked at each other and shook their heads.  Ambler said, “Those Missouri guys ain’t so smart.”  Outrider added,  “That’s right!!!  Naildriver wanted to know how tall the flagpole is, not how long it is.”

July 5, 2018 - From an Arkansas Shooter


Bubba, a fine young man from Arkansas, went to a Missouri College on a football scholarship. He was an excellent running back, but a very poor student.

At graduation day, Bubba didn't have enough credits. But he was a great football star so the Missouri students held a rally and demanded the dean give him a diploma anyway.

They were so insistent that the dean agreed if Bubba could answer one question correctly he would give him a diploma.

The one question test was held in the auditorium and the Missouri students packed the place.  It was standing room only.  The dean was on the stage and told Bubba to come up.

The dean had the diploma in his hand and said, "Bubba, if you can answer this question correctly I'll give you your diploma."

Bubba said he was ready and the dean asked him the question.

"Bubba," he said, "How much is three times seven?"

Bubba looked up at the ceiling and then down at his shoes, just pondering the question.

The Missouri students began chanting:  "Graduate him anyway!  Graduate him anyway!"

Then Bubba held up his hand and the auditorium became silent.

Bubba said, "I think I know the answer.  Three times seven is twenty-one."

A hush fell over the auditorium and the Missouri students began another chant.

 "Give him another chance!”

 “Give him another chance!”